I've already told you fine and gentle readers about my daughter, and how she recently started first grade. Well, my little man started his school this week. Granted he's only there 2 days a week and it's only until noon, it's still school. I had a range of emotions: sad, glee, and fear, to name a small few. (No, this is not a post about my feelings and my children, so be patient.) The one I didn't expect? Disgust. Wait for it ...
So, I walk my kid to class and there are 2 big, fancy baskets of goodies for the teachers. It's a "Survival Kit" for each of the teachers, thanks to another mom. Another mom who doesn't just stalk Pinterest. No, folks, she actually DOES the many things Pinterest boasts. Think apples, granola bars, bottles of water, pens, and Post-It notepads all stuffed (all artsy-fartsy like) in a cute basket with just the right amount of fluffy tissue paper. I can't blame the mom for her act of generosity and kindness (well, I can, but I am trying to not burn any bridges). I can, however, blame Pinterest. Yes, folks, I think Pinterest is ruining the world.
Here's how I see it. It's making all of us decent, average moms seem like total slackers. Think Roseanne on the sitcom bearing her name. She sat on the couch, ate Cheetos, and watched her kids come and go. She didn't help with homework, make dinner, volunteer in the school library, write inspirational notes, or do, well anything. She especially didn't make "Happy First Day Survival Baskets" for her kid's teachers. Never. That's something June Cleaver would do, and friends, I am no June Cleaver.
Now, I am no Roseanne either. But, The Pinterest is making me seem more Roseanne and less and less June.
Trust me, I rode the Pinterest train for a good while. I have many (a many, a many) a pin and many a board. I love the fashion ideas and have dreams of redecorating my home in about 1,000 different ways. But, fact is, haven't made a single (not one) recipe from the site. I've made no craft projects, haven't redecorated a stitch, painted a thing, or planned a holiday party. I've done nothing with baking soda (or powder, whatever), even though the site claims its 101 uses. I haven't woven a bracelet for a friend, put a new roof on my house (using recycled milk jugs), or taught my daughter how to speak Spanish in "Only 8 Hours!"
Here's how I roll: I pop a waffle in the oven and viola! I've made breakfast. Pinterest groupies are making egg muffins and bacon animal sculptures. Come Halloween, I buy pumpkins, give the kids a Sharpie marker and let them go to town. Pinterest says you need to carve it, preserve it in some homemade-concoction, slap on some glitter (that you cut up yourself with Martha Stewart), and light it with fireflies that you caught and harvested.
My tired, pitiful furniture is still tired and pitiful, because I haven't painted it or covered it in family photos. I haven't made a t-shirt out of a stick of gum, a random sock, and a strand of hair (that's what MacGyver is for). You see where I am going with this? Pinterest is making me look lazy, boring, and simple. If my nails are painted, they are one solid color. On all of my 10, or 20 considering the toes, digits. The Pinterest fans sport a different hue on each of the 20, including scenes from the Bible on every second finger or toe.
So, instead of you sharing what you ARE doing, thanks to Pinterest. Please, do share. Share what are you NOT doing. Join me in being lazy and unartistic and say it with me, "Down with Pinterest."